When I sat down to do my column this week, I was a bit torn. See, normally, I spend the better part of two or three days just trying to find something to write about. This week, though, I was struck with a bunch of different topics, all of which I thought would be super fun to discuss, and about each of which I thought I would have more than enough to say. How do you choose? I briefly considered going to the race track and randomly assigning each column topic to a separate horse and just let the racing gods decide my fate. Ultimately, though, I determined that was a less than ideal road, since horses scare me, as do people who frequent race tracks in the middle of the week, or on the weekends for that matter.
Instead, I decided I would combine my topics into one giant, super, Voltron-like column, in which I would simply move from one topic to another, laying out some brief and quick responses on a variety of issues. So, without further ado, let’s begin our journey down the wire in the magical land of television, a vast wasteland, as Newton Minnow once called it.
1. X-Files is coming back. Hooray. We’re going to get another six episodes of Mulder saying, “Believe me, Scully, it’s totes the albino chupacabra bigfoot terrorizing this town. Haven’t you been paying attention to the folk tales?” And then Scully is going to be like, “Bah. There’s no such thing as an albino chupacabra bigfoot.” And then, lo and behold, it turns out to be the albino chupcabra bigfoot.
2. Coach is also coming back. With original star, Craig T. Nelson. Too bad that, so far, the only returning character they have announced is easily the least interesting character in the original series.
3. Guys, DC’s decision to pull the Batgirl variant is a good one. It’s not pandering. It’s not censorship. Everything from the composition to the details within the cover paints a troubling image of power, and one that does not fit within the context of the current book. Stories do not exist within a vaccuum — there is a real world that shapes and informs them and gives them meaning. And it isn’t that the meaning of the story changes as the real world changes. It’s more that as the real world changes, we start to notice different meanings within the story, and that enhances the story itself. The other side of that equation is that the process can also reveal very troubling points of the story as well, and that’s not something that can be ignored. The Killing Joke is a good story, but it’s problematic in a lot of ways, and they are ways that should be talked about and discussed. We don’t have to erase it from comic continuity, but we also don’t have to idolize and glorify it either.
4. Marvel’s new Avengers book looks pretty amazing and remarkably fresh, and I love it for that.
5. On that note, I’m happy Miles Morales has found a home post Secret War. He needed one.
6. And Sam Wilson is awesome.
7. And while I haven’t read the female Thor, I’ve heard really good things about it. I should pick up the trades.
8. Remember when everyone was freaking out about Jesse Eisenberg being cast as Lex Luthor, and then they released that image, and everyone was like, “woah. What a great casting choice!” Hey Rhys, the next time you give me grief about going bald in my early 20’s, I’m going to point to this image and say, “see? Hair just drags you down. Losing your hair? That makes you a great actor.”
9. Idris Elba in Star Trek? Yes. Please.
And there you have it. If you were hoping for something more in depth on any of these topics, I apologize. Actually, no I don’t. It’s my column. I can write whatever I want. If you wanted something different, though, come back next week. I’m sure I’ll have something you’ll hate even more.